Wednesday, 15 May 2024

My Own Private Kobayashi Maru


The Kobayashi Maru scenario was first encountered in the film Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Captain Kirk’s solution to the scenario passed in Starfleet history and was, as Spock observed, unique.

I am currently going through what is proving to be a rather torturous redundancy consultation at work. Thus far the number of meetings has exceeded the normal number required to execute such a procedure as points are being batted back and forth.

It is exhausting and not without a degree of stress attached to it.

I am pretty certain that the outcome is inevitable but I am determined to leave no stone unturned in an attempt to stave off the end and have begun to see this very much as my own Kobayashi Maru - the ‘no win’ scenario of Star Trek fame. It is after all a test of character and so I am determined to fully engage with the process rather Han going meekly into the wilderness.

I am only two years away from retirement in any event but would have preferred to have reached that particular milestone under my own steam as I believe the likelihood of me securing another role where I can work on a fully remote basis is pretty slim.

Another incentive is that the ‘to do’ list being prepared by Laurel for me is large enough to register as a roundabout on Google Maps….

21 comments:

Maudlin Jack Tar said...

Best of luck with the negotiations.
You know you're in trouble when the Domestic "To Do" List achieves it's own gravity

Steve J. said...

My consultation was quick and amicable, as I'd been part-time for years and had seen the writing on the wall for a good few years before the inevitable happened. I was a tad miffed when it did come, but thought 'sod them', took the maximum I could get under the Government scheme and headed off to pastures new. Sadly not the huge payoffs I know some people get, which allows them to live in France etc with no worries, but c'est la vie as they say over there;)!

nobby said...

When you are retired, even early, you can ignore the To Do list.
You've worked a lifetime - it is time to rest.

 Ashley said...

I recommend watching an episode of House and channeling Hugh Laurie's character. Make them pay, make them suffer, be as awkward and cantankerous as possible, and most of all be right.

Chris said...

I am sorry to hear that you have to go through this. I can empathize. My school is in financial trouble thanks to the administration and their way of dealing with it is to try to force early retirement and/or take buyouts for faculty. Rumors are circulating that in June, they will actively let faculty go. I am two years away from retirement and despite all the nonsense that is going on, I hope to hold on for at least two years.

Pompey Dave said...

I found it a very strange game. They have to listen to suggestions to avoid redundancies, but they don't have to act on any of them. Within the "at risk" population there has to be a well-defined way of choosing who goes, but it always includes a management-decided fudge factor so they can pick the ones they want to keep and the ones they want to get rid of.
I was "at risk" several times, but never got the push and in the end took normal retirement with no redundancy. Did I miss out on a payment, or am I a winner for making it to the last space on the board? Who cares?

Mark Cordone said...

Best of luck! In my own experience, in the long run things have worked out for the best, even though that might not have been readily apparent at the time. Whatever the result, I hope that proves true for you as well.

tradgardmastare said...

Bon Chance!

Rob Young said...

You have my deepest sympathy. My wife Sandra and I managed seven redundancies between us in our working lives, my last one when I was 59. That last one went on for about two years - to be fair, it turned out to be the best thing financially that could have happened - early retirement, pension made up, pension lump sum plus maximum redundancy. Made up for the previous six. Point is, you do survive and you do recover from it...

Rob Young said...

Comment for Chris: My situation was similar to yours, though local authority rather than a school. They finished up giving a good deal - basically early retiement with no penalties, got my lump sum and redundancy - but then signed up with an agency (NT&AS - https://www.ntas.org.uk/recruitment - spent 10 years with them). Granted, I only had a year to go, but worth putting feelers out)

The Jolly Broom Man said...

Good luck matey. Make em pay. N’est ce pas!

David Crook said...

Hello there maudlin jack tar,

The to do list is long but most of it is fairly straightforward and my ‘treat’ for tackling it will be to reorganise the man cave which is in dire need of some TLC.

I am expecting to send rather more time up there than of late once the axe falls…. :-)

All the best,

DC

David Crook said...

Hi Steve J,

Since this first loomed over the horizon I sat down and crunched the numbers post employment and whilst income will obviously be down we certainly wont starve! The house is paid for and whilst both of us are a couple of years off the state pension I have a couple of smaller pensions and some modest savings etc. I would probably go for carers allowance and anything else that is out there if needs be.

In truth it will actually be a relief in many ways what with Laurel’s ongoing situation. It also means I will have more time for me (one the to do list has been tackled that is!).

All the best,

DC

David Crook said...

Hi Nobby,

The past couple of years has been a challenge and to borrow the well known quote from Tolkien I feel like ‘butter scraped over too much bread’.

A degree of care and maintenance will be required around the house but I will certainly have more time for fun stuff.

All the best,

DC

David Crook said...

Hi Ashley,

That sounds worryingly like a good idea and yes - I have been doing exactly that (except for the House part - never watched it!).

All the best,

DC

David Crook said...

Hi Chris,

I am sorry to hear that and like you only have two years until retirement anyway. I wanted to stay the course but the likelihood of me getting anything else is pretty slim.

The sword of Damocles is about to fall methinks.

All the best and good luck!

DC

David Crook said...

Hi Pompey Dave,

This has been my thought as well and so I have pushed back on a number of issues that I believe are less than transparent shall we say.

I am resisting more from hope than expectation - because I can and I have absolutely nothing to lose by doing so.

All the best,

DC

David Crook said...

Hi Mark,

I have a feeling you are absolutely correct in that and time will confirm in due course.

All the best,

DC

David Crook said...

Hello there tradgardmastare,

Many thanks old chap,

All the best,

DC

David Crook said...

Hi Rob,

This will be my third redundancy and given that I have only been with the company for a little over two and half years we are not talking life changing sums of money. Negotiations are ongoing but the company usually only pays the bare minimum it can get away with.

I am not unduly worried but the whole process is tedious and I shall be glad when it is over so that I can get on with my life.

All the best,

DC

David Crook said...

Hiya JBM,

Still fighting the good fight but reckon that the final round is here (actually next Monday at 4:30).

It will be OK in the long run - it is just bloody tedious to deal with when you know what the outcome will be!

All the best,

DC