This is a long running and continuing journey around a collection of ideas, projects, games, models and a variety of wargaming related themes from my own imagination and from others. As I have been described as having the attention span of a forgetful goldfish you can rest assured the resulting subject matter will be diverse and (usually) entertaining! "He lived in a frenzy of enthusiasm — but nothing
lasted for long with him".
Tuesday, 6 July 2010
The Sword in the Sand....and so it begins
Those readers intersted in such things may like to take a look at the first instalment of my 'blovel' on my other blog - http://theswordinthesand.blogspot.com/
An excellent start, there Ogre, with some intriguing possibilities already set out which do much to pique the reader's interest - just what does the enigmatic Sir Benjamin have in mind for our narrator?
I like the way it only took until the second paragraph to mention Turkey!
The description of the protagonist puts me in mind of that given by Dr Watson in introducing us to Sherlock Holmes, and this is where my one slight criticism comes in - think you have perhaps given a little too much detail as to Royston all in one go - it's quite a lot to take in, and does rather come across as him being somewhat arrogant in detailing so much about himself. I found myself not warming to him, especially after his assertions regarding how suited he would be to writing the possible biography and its likely success, so perhaps here, less is more - if your intention was to set his expectations and self-confidence up for a fall, however, with some subsequent cathartic character development, then on the right track I think. Anyway, excellent to see your 'opus' begin, can't wait to read more! All the best, SteelonSand.
1 comment:
An excellent start, there Ogre, with some intriguing possibilities already set out which do much to pique the reader's interest - just what does the enigmatic Sir Benjamin have in mind for our narrator?
I like the way it only took until the second paragraph to mention Turkey!
The description of the protagonist puts me in mind of that given by Dr Watson in introducing us to Sherlock Holmes, and this is where my one slight criticism comes in - think you have perhaps given a little too much detail as to Royston all in one go - it's quite a lot to take in, and does rather come across as him being somewhat arrogant in detailing so much about himself.
I found myself not warming to him, especially after his assertions regarding how suited he would be to writing the possible biography and its likely success, so perhaps here, less is more - if your intention was to set his expectations and self-confidence up for a fall, however, with some subsequent cathartic character development, then on the right track I think.
Anyway, excellent to see your 'opus' begin, can't wait to read more!
All the best, SteelonSand.
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